A ninety-minute t.v. special on Britney Spears is scheduled? Give me a break. Ninety minutes of description in prime time are to be given to a pop singer who whines forgettable, electronically-distorted tunes backed by tinny, banging drums, while she prances in her spangled shorts and bleached-blond hair? Ninety minutes for this erratic, drunk-driving "celebrity" from the piney woods of Louisiana? You think I'm going to watch such nonsense? You betcha I will. Then I plan to dress up my parakeet as Britney for Halloween---little spangled shorts and bleached-blond feathers.
-Old Doc
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