My liver's shot, says my doctor. Too much hard drinking, too many lectures delivered half-drunk, too many student reports graded while I was sopped with liquor and could hardly see. My Uncle Gustav also had liver trouble. He took what is known as the brand name Carter's Little Liver Pills all his life. Good, strong stuff, but I don't think it's available anymore in stores. Anyway, when Uncle Gustav died, they had to beat his liver to death.
-Old Doc
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