Back to the Confessional

I moved my butt to church this morning for Palm Sunday and Holy Week. When the little woman and I arrived, I had her drop me in front, and had her drive her way to the far back side of the giant parking lot, because, well, she just needs more practice in weaving in and out of lanes.

While waiting for her to walk back to the front door of the church, I could see inside that all of the many religious statues and pictures were covered with long red cloths. Four different couples in their 30s walked past me to enter, and upon seeing the covered objects, they themselves exclaimed to each other, "Look at that. I wonder why all the statutes are draped like that?"

I seized the opportunity to tell each couple, "Good morning, folks. Well, today begins Holy Week, and it's so important, all pastors have the duty once a year at this time to test the religious knowledge of their people. So after the service, our pastor will conduct an important quiz with the statutes and pictures. We'll have to name from memory all the saints and scenes under the coverings."

"Ohhh, no," was the response of every one of them as they proceeded with looks of surprise and apprehension to leave me to find a pew for seating.

Never underestimate the religious illiteracy of the American people.