Tillmos and Trulwups

From the That Clears Things Up Department:
"He was a state sponsor of terror. In other words, the government had declared, 'You are a state sponsor of terror.'" (President George W. Bush on Saddam Hussein)

From the I'll Try Anything Once Department:
English-language menu items in a restaurant in Cordoba, Spain: "Embezzled egg" and "Pudding with scum"

From the Astonishingly Fascinating Books Department:
Actual book titles in Britain: "A Study of Hospital Waiting Lists in Cardiff, 1953-1954," "Parish Ministers' Hats," "The Toothbrush: Its Use and Abuse"

From the Is There One Person out There Who Understands This? Department:
"There's more secrets in my family than there is in a hot dinner." (British talk-show host Jeremy Kyle)

From the Expert Predictions Department:
"A.A.A. Says Record Gas-Price Predictions May or May Not Come True" (headline in the Kingsport, Tennessee "Times-News")