Letters (Blogs?) from a Nut

Author Ted Nancy had a bestseller in 1997, "Letters from a Nut" (Avon Press). His book was a collection of about 100 letters which he had written to, and replies from, various hotels, museums, restaurants, product makers, etc. in America. In each letter he wrote, he tried to seem as sincere as possible as he asked the particular recipient---say, a hotel manager---if he could have a room reserved, and be allowed to bring his private, giant mattress into his room; or to, say, a bus company, if he could ride the bus crosscountry while fully dressed in a red-shrimp costume. Many businesses took the bait, and sent Nancy their own sincere (and thus hilarious) replies, going out of their way to make sure that they would not lose a potential customer. Well, ten years have passed, and it was time for someone else---in this case, I---to do the same thing, albeit it on a much-reduced scale. But the two-dozen similar letters I mailed to businesses didn't net one single reply. Are hotel clerks, restaurant managers, etc. that much more sophisticated these days? Was "Letters from a Nut" now included in their training programs? Did my scrawled signature on my letters look roughly like Ted Nancy's? I don't know. I do know I've missed out on any complimentary coupons, the kind of which Nancy received from some of them.

Speaking of letters: Over the years, I've written a few hundred professional, business, or personal letters to other professionals. Guess which category or profession has been outstanding for not even acknowledging my initial letter? No, not physicians, as busy as they are. No, not college professors, as arrogant as they might be. Catholic clergymen---not Protestant nor otherwise. Go figure. Maybe Catholic clergymen can most readily detect deviousness.

-Old Doc